Before the fog moved in

Sometimes I think that dawn is God's second chance. That one that comes every day.

So this is it-that first awkward blog post. After what's been one hell of a ride in the first month of '05...the personal side of the personal, the subjective of the objective, and the messy side of the polished...oh hell-why not, what's a little spent pride on the bloody information superhighway. Blogs as literature. Blogs as therapy. Blogs are as close as you can get to an 8 second reride in the rodeo of life.

Actually the rodeo analogy is way accurate.This year is already turning into a very bad draw on a very rank bull. You think you've got the ride down and then...Hell no, where did that twist come from?

You're catching serious air.Know that story?

The in between-the-lines stuff. The embarrassing face plant followed by the muffled, "stay tuned folks & we'll see if he's gonna be ok" coming back at ya from the announcer's booth. The staggering, bewildering, get your bearings, "what in the hell just happened?" look. Then you actually consider for a moment just trying something a little bit different, trying a reride, to see if you can get another outcome. The therapist set calls this mood "bargaining".

I'm all there.

So yup, this is the month of the face plant.I somehow turned 40 this week. The day itself was the biggest non event of my life, other than the folks at the Newport Post Office giving me a hard time, and I got confused and performed the accidental act of going through the "15 items or less line" at Safeway with something like 80 cans of soup. I also took an unexpected trip to an unidentified place which will remain unexplained for the time being.

Anyway, 40 wasn't like I planned it to be. It wasn't anything. Well, anything other than a lot of staring back at you walls, a lot of time to think, and a lot of questions that no one seems to have answers for. Oh yeah and more of the same two weeks of fog. My God the fog just stays and stays and its never been like this before and February, where in the hell are you? I'm posting blue sky pics right now, because I could use an extra helping of blue sky.

Hold the con trails please.